awakening

If I had time, or inclination, I could list some issues, some facts, and would be worth nothing.
So the feet tread the ground as one advances, by will, just to say that this is not  stupid or that is rotten filth: I'm not that, but sometimes yes I am; and began my asshole philosophy.
It is something (for choose one word (and do not know how to justify) more or less viable)strange  what I feel , I think that words do not do it justice. Is not it strange to put a parenthesis within a parenthesis? Anyway, my mind, my thoughts in particular have increasingly become to a clear propensity to the  abyss of redundancy, making again and again the same questions. There is a notable extension of my being, that want to put an end to this in an awakening of consciousness, but does that exist?
At one point I came to the conclusion of happiness as higher end, as the engine of everything.
Then I thought better stop thinking ...